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GQ’s Jonah Keri: ‘No one wants’ Bruins to win 06.09.11 at 4:31 pm ET
By Sam Dykstra

In a piece written for GQ.com entitled “The Boston Bruins vs. The World,” noted sportswriter Jonah Keri has a simple but sharp message for the Bruins and their fans.

After spending a few paragraphs discussing the “We want the Cup” chant that has filled the TD Garden and discussing how every other NHL team wants a Stanley Cup, Keri writes, “But you, Bruins fans? No one wants you to have it.”

He notes that there are plenty of good reasons to root for the B’s. Among them are Tim Thomas‘s long journey to stardom, Alexandre Burrows‘s bite on Patrice Bergeron and Nathan Horton‘s season-ending concussion. But Keri still adds “You know what? We’re still not rooting for you.”

His main reasoning behind this thesis is that Boston fans complain of “The Drought,” the 39-year period since the B’s have lost won the Stanley Cup, when the Red Sox, Patriots and Celtics have all took home trophies in the last decade. Since Keri claims that all Bruins fans also root for these other squads, there should be no remorse for those who don the black and gold.

“You sound like the douchebag who [expletive] that, after the three-bedroom in Tribeca, the place in the Hamptons, the kids’ boarding school, the annual trips to Paris and Aruba, the four cars, and two alimonies, you’ve barely got enough left for that third bottle of Dom at Per Se,” Keri writes before concluding, “We feel for the 12 Bruins fans who’ve shunned the city’s other franchises and waited nearly 40 years for their shot. The rest of you? Prepare yourselves for heartbreak. Until the day after Vancouver wins the Cup, when you can watch your first-place Red Sox try to break Boston’s Three-Year Curse.”

Read More: Boston Bruins, Jonah Keri, Nathan Horton, Patrice Bergeron Print  |  Email   | Bark It Up!  |  Digg It
  • Deano

    Jonah Keri stick to the fashion world. Just write about what guy looks the hottest and why you enjoy gay sex, leave hockey to people who actually know what they are talking about. Jonah is probably hoping the Miami Heat win the Stanley Cup.

    Jonah Keri; I am officially nominating you for biggest douche in the Universe, good luck.

  • joe

    what a goofy article…kinda obvious everyone is rooting for boston

  • Eric

    Basically this is an attention grab from a bad writer in a magazine nobody cares about so he can try to sell a couple more copies of a book he wrote that nobody cares about. Nice work Jonah! You’ve managed to become a no talent bum in three different mediums, Print, Digital & Real life!

  • David

    What a moron….

  • http://Enteryourwebsite... Jeff

    Don’t get me wrong there are alot of pink hats out there, but I an an orioles fan, cowboys fan, and don’t waste my time with basket ball. For that I must be one of the four. On that however, from all the reports that I see, unless your from vancouver our montreal you are cheering for the bruins. Now what I’m curious about is how this guy gets a job as a writer and to his bosses can I have his job, what a D
    UMB ASS

  • Nicky

    clearly you know a lot about sports…. NOT. GO BRUINS

  • Dan

    Keri is a noted Montreal fan and has always blurred the line of acceptable “objective sportswriter.” He is a good writer and I am not quite sure what the heck he is doing with GQ but any Habs fan who bleeds Blanc, Bleu et Rouge would probably say the same thing. Now, the Bruins do have Jack Edwards to account for, so I think it is even.

  • Dan

    Also Sam, 39 years, not 29 years.

  • edb

    Dan, Jackie MacMullen made the same mistake tonight
    http://espn.go.com/boston/conversations/_/id/6646006/game-5-win-order-series-turnaround-mean-anything-boston-bruins

    Looks like sports writer is struggling to quickly become a Bruins beat reporter, now that they have a shot at the Cup.

  • http://www.gqisgay.com TCnels

    Umm ya stick to fashion GQ leave the Sports to ESPN 98.5 The Sports HUB and the other PROS. Maybe next time you wanna talk about sports give out some advice on trendy golf apparel

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